elilaa's Blog

That's the working title for my story. Do you like my banner?

Okay I'm still behind with NaNoWriMo  but I've found a way to spread out my words so it doesn't seem like I'm really far behind. If I write 3000 words a day I will be finished on the 28th leaving me two free days! (You can work out how many words I've written so far! ) I'm still confident that I can do it but I've got to stop procrastinating. I write 1000 words an hour so three hours a day doesn't seem that much to me but that doesn't mean I can put it off until the end of the day. I'll try spreading it out over the day to see if that makes it easier, although I think that once I start writing I'll want to do all 3000 in one go. Oh well, we'll see. Time to go start writing my 3000 for today.

Doing well today. Wrote 3000 words in 3 hours mainly thanks to Write or Die; a really useful website that anyone should use if they're behind. It really helped push me along.

Write or Die

Right now though I'm in a bit of a bad mood so I won't be doing any more writing today. My dad started saying that I should get a job even though I already have one! It's only part time though and I don't think he really understands what I do so he thinks it's not a "real" job. He doesn't bring this up for months then I tell him that I'll be trying to write 50,000 words in one month and he picks that same month to start going on at me about jobs! The only thing I really want to do is write. I want to be a writer. I don't want to be anything else. Isn't that what life is about? Being happy with what you're doing and doing something that you love no matter what? Why would you want to spend years of your life wasting it away in some dead end job you hate just for money? You can't buy happiness, as they say.

My parents always taught me to do what makes me happy, whatever that is. So that's what I'm trying to do. And I know it's real easy for me to say all these things when I know I have a roof over my head and I don't have to worry too much about money, but I've spent the majority of my life being unhappy and I'm sick of it.

I may never become a successful best selling writer or ever be financially able to write full time, but this is what I love so I'm not going to stop.

So I scrapped my first story idea. It just wasn't flowing out very well and I didn't feel comfortable writing it. So I picked another story idea I've had for a while now and it feels so much better. It just flows out so easily. Of course this means I'm even further behind than I was but hopefully because it's so easy to write I'll soon catch up.

That's probably why I was behind in the first place.

Oh well!

The British government is to introduce a “three strikes and you’re out” rule to combat the illegal downloading of copyrighted material from the Internet.

From April next year, offenders will initially receive warning notifications, followed by targeted legal action by copyright holders. The government would reserve powers to suspend accounts as a “last resort” for the most serious infringers.

That's from The Irish Times website.

The same article said that 1 in 20 tracks downloaded are downloaded legally, meaning that 19 out of 20 are downloaded illegally and I can say that I have contributed to that number. I have downloaded music illegally. I knew it was wrong but I did it anyway. The reason I did it was because, for myself, that was the best option.

Two plates are put in front of you each with a cake on them. Both cakes are identical except that one is free while the other one you have to pay for. You are told how hard the baker has worked on them. The baker won't know which one you picked but at the end of the day he will know how many in total were paid for and how many free ones people had taken. Which one would you pick?

Sure everybody would like to think that they'd be kind and appreciative and pick the one you have to pay for but if this choice was given to you every single time you wanted a cake eventually most people would pick the free one. Maybe not every time but sometimes you would pick the free one.

It's the same with music. The choice is always there when you want a song.

I'm not saying it's right to download music illegally I'm just stating the facts.

Sometimes when I download a song after a week or two I get sick of the song and simply delete it. If I had to pay for that song I'd be pretty annoyed, which again pushes me to illegal downloading. I say pushes but I know that it is ultimately my choice to do something illegal not someone else's. I'm not trying to move the blame off me.

Another thing I'm worried about (and the main thing I'm worried about) with this is invasion of privacy. How do they know exactly what I'm downloading? Are there people spying on my computer watching everything I do? How will this work?

It just makes me a bit itchy...

////

On another note I'm doing NaNoWriMo!

And I'm already behind!!

Wish me luck!

How odd that the "I Am Lonely" group has 7722 members.

Surely they'd all start talking and help each other to stop being lonely...

Maybe some people need to see others, in person, to stop feeling lonely. Personally I just need to go on the Internet and without even typing anything I stop feeling lonely completely. There are so many people here that I find it impossible to feel lonely! And when I say here I'm not even talking exclusively about EP, I'm talking about any website. It's like I can feel the presence of the thousands of people that are online or the people that have written something or made a website and I know I'm not alone. There is always someone out there to talk to.

It's sad that all those members of "I Am Lonely" can't feel this too.

I started a group and wrote a story for it but I think it came out all wrong...

Didn't know how else to word it, maybe I will later so I can go back and change it.

Oh well! It's just the Internet.

Alice in Wonderland and The Wizard of Oz are pretty darn similar if you ask me!

They both have young girls as main characters who end up in a magical world and follow something (yellow brick road & the White Rabbit) and there's an evil woman who wants to kill them (the Queen of Hearts & the Wicked Witch of the West), they both have animals as companions (Toto & Dinah/the Cheshire Cat) and it is revealed to be a dream the girl had at the end.

Alice in Wonderland was written first so if I was going to say one copied the other I'd say Oz copied Alice, at least in the basic outline of the story.

Who knows. I only noticed the similarities between them recently and just wanted to write them down.

I prefer Alice in Wonderland though. The Wizard of Oz freaked me out as a kid.

It's 2:39am here so it's the 7th of July now.

7/7

I can't believe so much time has passed.

I can't think of anything meaningful to say.

I wonder if anyone else will.

...

I feel so helpless...useless.

I... think I dislocated my kneecap... twice.

The first time I had my leg in a weird position and when I went to straighten it it felt like something was out of place and it hurt, but I straightened it and whatever it was seemed to go back into place.

I thought it was just because I had my leg in a weird position so I forgot about it (after telling my dad).

But it happened again yesterday...

I was sitting cross-legged this time and it was perhaps a week, maybe two after the first time. I suddenly realised that my knee felt weird so I quickly started to straighten it and sure enough the same pain was there as I did it, and something sort of slid or clicked (not really sure how to describe it) back into place.

I was scared both times so I didn't stop to see what it looked like.

I told my dad it happened again.

It still feels weird. Like it's going to do it again any minute.

What should I do? Was it a dislocated kneecap?

My knees smell good.

^______________^

It's such a lovely day. But hot. I've got a fan next to me and most of the windows are open.

I only like to wear baggy clothes in the summer. Tight clothes just make me hotter.

The sky is pretty today.

I've been having fun today!